During my game programming meeting, I was handed a few materials from David - said they were cleaning out their pile of misc CKI stuff and they found a few things that belonged to me. It had my Bronze MRP award from last year, as well as other CKI materials I should've received even further back when I joined four years ago.
It's all coming back to me now - the MRP award was the break point between remaining and leaving for that year. My goal was to leave with at least something notable, and the MRP award was the easiest - I had to do 50 hours of volunteering in events. It was going to be a tough one as this would require attending nearly all local events and every interclub and district event available, and I managed to pull through. I was lucky to end with Bronze - no one (save maybe a officer or two) from UOP has ever achieved anything higher than a Silver, particularly since there's barely enough events at UOP CKI during the year to give you over 50 service hours total, and this figure includes service project and district interclubs. (Other schools, like Davis, has no problem with giving you Platinum Status, which is awarded at the 200 service hour mark, if you at least made an attempt at going to at least half of the weekly events.)
At the end of last year, my Bronze Star was taken, leaving me with only a two second recognition period, without a bronze star pin on my nametag that DCON - it essentially voided all my efforts as part of A-Board. I said my goodbyes since I would be graduating. Turns out there's a few more classes I had to take, so that means staying another year, but I felt already discouraged from last year's events, all the work without bring really recognized, and without a major position of importance, I appeared only periodically, though it was mainly due to other members (mainly from UOP) wanting me back. That support disappeared in Spring, and I retired completely.
Now that I have my award proper, I do see it this way: Was this a last attempt to get me to return? If I got more recognition and a better position, I would certainly do that, but I'm going to be done at UOP in less than three weeks time... to find a job, to eventually move out. Though I don't want to leave my friends from Capital behind, espeically Nhi Tran (the only other person in Davis perceived as a closer friend), I'm pressured to move on.
Will I ever find anyone from past interclubs that sees me as someone more than just an acquaintance? To hang out, to do stuff with... outside of CKI? That's something I'll probably never know.